As harsh as it sounds, a parent’s job is to ultimately make yourself unnecessary. Parenthood means raising children for a world in which they can succeed independent of mom and dad. What can you do to encourage independence?
Give your child an opportunity to apply what he/she has learned after you have showed him/her how to do things such as operating or the use of objects or devices, fixing his/her own drink, packing up stuff after use, cleaning his/her own mess, doing homework, and even on helping other kids on things. This will allow your child to develop the confidence to do things on his/her own, instead on relying on you even on small things.
Make a daily schedule of his/her activities. Post this on where he/she can easily find it. Make sure that this schedule is strictly followed as much as possible to establish the security on routines. If things at home and school are done in routines, it would be easy for the child to learn how to do things and at the same time, develop the sense of responsibility and discipline in them.
Let your child get used to asking favors and talking to people nicely especially in gatherings. This way, your child wouldn’t need to call you for help each time he/she needs something such as asking for a glass of water or in making friends with others. The use of good manners will be reinforced as well.
Allow your children to participate in activities such as fulfilling tasks in home and school, parties, summer classes, talent shows, and the like. These will develop self-confidence and will allow your child to discover his/her potentials and skills in doing things all by him/herself.
Affirmation will help your child sustain the confidence on doing things all by his/herself. Be in the know of everything and affirm on the things done right. However, consider the age of your child also and the manner of praising you give especially when there are people around, to avoid embarrassment on their part.
Like what i said, allow your child to discover his/herself: his/her capabilities, skills, talents, limitations and allow him/her to face these with confidence and with positivity. When a child grows in confidence, independence will take place in any situation he/she may go through. Remember, a child can never grow without an opportunity so as parents, we need to provide him/her with these opportunities to make them learn how to fly.
